Feel like you are running out of men to date and frustrated by the non-committals but ready for a real relationship?My name is Candace, a love coach for single, professional women looking for real, long-lasting love. I find this hilarious, seeing as none of my girlfriends who are so gung-ho about this app would ever make the first move when we're actually talking to guys in real life. I already asked around to see how to make the first move IRL.

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From unapologetic puns about neutering pets to side-splitting two-liners about the differences between cats and dogs, get ready to laugh your head off! They've got no less than 20 one-liners to share with you, and we bet you'll be in fits of laughter in no time.

These Hilarious One-Liners Are Monstrously Funny... This Joke Starts With a Man in the Fertilized Egg Business Whitey is in the fertilized egg business, with several hundred young hens laying eggs for him.

I love a man with a great sense of humor and who is intelligent - a man who has a great smile. I like a man who is very ambitious and driven and who has a good heart and makes me feel safe.

I like a man who is very strong and independent and confident - that is very sexy - but at the same time, he's very kind to people. But one thing I can say from my dating experience is that a physical attraction will only take you so far.

What sacrifices will I have to make in terms of being myself, if I'm with a man? Generally the guy I'm attracted to is the guy in the club with all the tattoos and nail polish.

Something that young women find out really quickly is that when you start dating, all of a sudden you're supposed to have a role. He's usually the lead singer in a punk band and plays guitar.Headline word limits can also make things sound cheesy and cliché, so focus on using this space to make someone laugh or smile.About the Author: Candace Wong Are you using technology to find love?For example, yarn, purl, gym, yoga, instead of tunisian, fair isle, or deadlift.Better alternatives include using song lyrics or memorable movie one liners.When I polled Facebook users for their tips on creating usernames I got vague advice like “be yourself” and “be authentic,” “use your name,” and comments such as “usernames are not at all important, as long as they are not terrible.”Imagine you found 20 people online attractive.