I don’t want to, and I want to avoid the conversation at all costs. A: It’s good to know that your friend will be able to separate her frustration at the unfairness of life from her feelings of love and support for you specifically.It’s not that I think she would be upset with me, but she would be upset and I totally understand—life is unfair. I think all you can do is tell her your good news without piling on too many apologies.

Please enjoy telling that story to any friends she brings home from college.) Q. But when there’s no lid, I still put the seat down so if the next person to use the bathroom is a woman (or a man who will be sitting), the seat will already be down and they won’t have to handle the seat.

I think men tend to be the ones who make the seats gross in the first place so we should be the ones saddled with this mildest of burdens to occasionally touch toilet seats.

” The book may be a great supplement, but it’s not a replacement for a conversation with you.

(Also, that zoo story is going to be such great embarrassment material in about 10 years. When I use a gender-neutral bathroom to pee, I put the toilet lid down when I’m done.

If not for focusing on them, their loss, and how I can try to fill that space for them, I would not get out of bed. Suddenly, all of my friends and family act as if some magical boundary has been crossed and the time for grieving is up.

They encouraged me to date gently at first, but now more and more urgently. This level of being OK was so hard to reach and now even that is not enough.

Congratulations on at least getting a paid-off car out of this whole situation.

You won’t be able to convince people not to gossip or judge your ex, if only because what he did was incredibly cinematic and attention-getting, but you can certainly say, “It was a surprise, but I’m not as devastated over it as you might think—our relationship was rapidly losing steam, and it’s honestly for the best that he’s with someone else now.

You can say you understand this may be tricky for her for a while, and acknowledge that she’s going through a difficult time.

But you can’t unring this bell for her, and however she processes her complicated feelings about your pregnancy, it’s not going to be with you. Romantic comedy: Last month, my fiancé left me for his ex and canceled our wedding. Now that everything has settled down, I find myself relieved.

Mallory Ortberg, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. (Sign up below to get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week. We can sometimes have lengthy discussions on a wide range of topics.