It seems to me as I get more and more clarity into the dysfunctional family system that just as the grooming process of a child is methodical, so is the discrediting process of that same child.

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In questionable taste but around about is the moment to look out for.

Seriously "The Good Life" is a great comedy series and I can watch the episodes over and over again on Sky and have done so.

Another most unfortunate result of this kind of conditioning is that it sends a message to other perpetrators that this child is not believable, leaving that child vulnerable to other predators as well.

Please share your thoughts about how a child becomes known as the black sheep and how this in fact serves the ultimate purpose of the abuser or any other thoughts you wish to share here.

I am not a sheep, I have my own mind I have had enough of being told what and how to think Whilst we are still allowed the remnants of free speech, I will speak out.

I also reserve the right to discuss less controversial matters should I feel the urge.

This definition of me will protect the perpetrators of abuse from having the spotlight of truth shone on them.

When I looked at it through this grid of understanding, it’s easy to conclude that not only is there a twofold result when this happens but there there is also a twofold motive in conditioning and defining a child in this way. Seeing the whole thing through that grid of both WHY and HOW children are used as scapegoats, labeled as “the problem” and defined as depressed, story tellers, in need of medication, difficult and “always that way” made it easier for me to understand how I willingly stopped fighting their warped definition of me and accepted it for all those years.

I was groomed to believe that the problem WAS me; I tried hard to accept that even though deep down I still thought I was right that I had been wronged but because no one validated me in any of my distress, I continued to beat myself up for not getting over it.